Here’s the thing about life. You make a plan, you put it in place, you organize, and you execute. Then something kills your execution. This is me right now. I’ve created this plan for dreaming, I’m executing and it’s being killed. My little guy has been waking me up every.single.night. This is what I’m working with people. I’ll be mid-dream, something awesome is happening, but it’s interrupted and I don’t remember all of it. So I decided to put my capsules by my bed and take them after my middle of the night visit from my little buddy. I woke up @ 3 am, miraculously on my own and not by an adorable little body, and I popped 4 capsules of mugwort. I read for about 30 mins then set off for Dream Town. As I fell asleep I kept my mind steady focused on the act of falling asleep. I’m still here, my body is present, my head is on the pillow. I’m not asleep yet. I’m still here, my body is present, my head is on the pillow, I’m not asleep yet. And repeat.
I slowly started to see the swirls of color you see as you drift off. It’s called hypnagogia and it’s what happens just after being awake and just before you fall asleep. I’ve experience it often, but this time the colors were much more vibrant, like crisp neon colors, much more than the blues and purples I typically see. The swirls made very distinct images too – cats, dragons, so cool.
As sleep crept in I began to hear the infamous swoosh associated with astral travel. I’ve read that it begins by a swoosh sound as your astral body (non physical body) detaches from your physical body. I was both excited and scared when I realized what was happening. As fear won, I could feel the thud of my astral body returning to my physical body. But yet no other part of me moved. I tried to tell myself I was so brave and could allow myself to be aware of the travel and the swoosh rolled in like a dream train then I felt afloat. Then I got scared and thud. This continued all night until I heard my little guy come in. He snuck onto my bed so quietly, usually it’s more of an elephant like I’M HERE Y’ALL.
He rubbed my back and fluttered around. I didn’t address him, I think I was playing dead so I wouldn’t have to fully wake up and walk him back to his room. Then I felt the thud and was suddenly completely conscious. My door was closed, there was no little guy in my bed, in fact no sign of him anywhere. Was his physical body ever there? Or is he braver than me? Did he astral travel to me when I didn’t have the balls to do it myself? And is he really that incredibly sweet that when choosing to astral travel, it’s snuggling with me he wants to do? I think YES on all accounts. He’s a gifted little boy, and I wouldn’t doubt that he astral traveled to me to show me it doesn’t have to be scary.
I think I’ll take a break from the herbs next week and focus on astral travel strategy and overcoming my fears.